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A Follow On Post To My Previous ShynessThread

Discussion in 'Sidewinders Bar & Grille' started by stevierayfan91, Mar 14, 2019.

  1. stevierayfan91

    stevierayfan91 Deeply Shy. Strat-Talk Supporter

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    Hi, buddies
    I am an introvert whose also deeply shy.
    My deep shyness is separate aspect of me.

    I read recently a book called Quiet:The Hidden Strengths of Introverts by Susan Cain.
    Not trying to say is a flaw. Just that this book showed me some ideas and skills I had as a result of introvert style.
     
    Last edited: Mar 15, 2019
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  2. nungesser

    nungesser Prolix!Prolix Nothing a pair of scissors can't fix Strat-Talk Supporter

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    I guess I was always shy or thought I was but as I've gotten older I realise maybe I'm not as concerned as others in being the center of attention or having to speak louder than everybody else to be heard so I'm thinking that these days I'm content as opposed to shy
     
  3. tery

    tery Most Honored Senior Member Strat-Talk Supporter

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    Many of us are shy and can only "say" things on the computer that we would never say in "real life" .
     
  4. Mansonienne

    Mansonienne Stratocrastinator Extraordinaire Staff Member Strat-Talk Supporter

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    I’m very shy but have gotten much better at managing it.
    However, I’m not particularly reserved, which probably helps!:D
     
  5. duzie

    duzie Senior Stratmaster

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    I’m usually very quiet around people I don’t know.
    It can give you a chance to find out about someone and whether or not you really want to associate with them.
     
  6. Stratbats

    Stratbats Strat-O-Master

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    Very shy here... I especially don't do well in crowds... Have always been happiest by myself. Use your shyness to your advantage!
     
  7. abnormaltoy

    abnormaltoy Mouth breathin' knuckle dragger Strat-Talk Supporter

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    I was always the new kid in school...an awful lot of fights, but also new social groups to navigate. I learned to hide my shyness, by being a clown, a battering ram to the guys that wanted to fight, tormentor of school officials, and protector of kids being picked on. Now, the only time shyness is an issue, is when playing in front of new people.
     
  8. Bodean

    Bodean Just A Simple Man Strat-Talk Supporter

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    I am an introverted extrovert.
     
  9. strat_strummer

    strat_strummer Senior Stratmaster Strat-Talk Supporter

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    I cant say I am shy but I tend to keep to myself in crowds..
     
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  10. Dadocaster

    Dadocaster Dr. Stratster Strat-Talk Supporter

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    I am one of those new fangled "Non-shy introverts." I am not particularly shy but I do not always want to engage and I need my alone time.
     
  11. montemerrick

    montemerrick you can't stay the fool Strat-Talk Supporter

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    i'm shy until i've figured out the room. then i'm henny youngman mother jones abbie hoffman martin buber and corey from juia (so one-fifth fictitious, but that fifth has diahann carroll for his mother.)
     
  12. crawdaddy

    crawdaddy Senior Stratmaster

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    Ditto.....thanks, you saved me some typing....
     
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  13. RaySachs

    RaySachs Senior Stratmaster Strat-Talk Supporter

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    I don't think being shy and being an introvert are the same thing. I'm not particularly shy - I'm happy to initiate contact or a conversation with someone I've just met or run into. But I also consider myself an introvert.

    The best definition I ever read or heard of the difference between an introvert and an extrovert is that an extrovert feeds off of and gets energy from interacting with other people. They can be with others all day and be energized at the end of the day - they GET energy from other people. An introvert, OTOH, can like people enormously and enjoy their company as much as an extrovert, BUT IN LIMITED DOSES. Because the introvert is USING or DRAINING energy when they're around and interacting with other people. It wears them out and after a certain amount of time, they just have to withdraw. They need time alone to recharge their batteries to be up for the next time they're around other people. I'm absolutely like that. I love other people and being around them. But only for a little while and then I crave time to myself. And only when I'm getting plenty of alone time (or time with just my wife and/or daughters, who I'm connected with in a way that I'm as comfortable in their company as I am alone). I know you can be an introvert without being shy - I'm one of them. I'm not sure how it would work to be an extrovert while also being shy, but I wouldn't be surprise if that's possible too - someone who craves being around other people even if it's hard for them to take the first step in getting to know new people???

    -Ray
     
  14. circles

    circles Dr. Stratster Strat-Talk Supporter

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    YES.

    I took my last job as a teacher to force myself to get up in front of people and talk, it forced me to overcome that fear. However one on one it's more challenging, but I've been trying to work on that. Agreed with RaySachs on the fact that we do socialize, but it is more strenuous.

    Funny thing is, I can get up on stage with a guitar and be totally comfortable. My analysis of that is 1) I'm having fun 2) I'm hiding behind my guitar and 3) everyone is paying attention to the front man, barring solos.
     
  15. jaybones

    jaybones Dr. Stratster Strat-Talk Supporter

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    I used to be painfully shy as a kid. Literally hid behind my mom's skirts.

    But I compensated with humor.

    And learned to look at people's bridge of thier nose in conversation.

    I'm what a psychologist calls an introvert with exagerated extrovert tendencies.
     
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  16. Nadnitram

    Nadnitram Senior Stratmaster

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    At heart, I'm shy. But I seem outgoing. In modern terminology, I think it would be described as "social anxiety." I get so jittery in social situations that the only thing I can think to do is try to make a joke. I especially can't stand a lull in the conversation, even for a few seconds. My brain freezes. So I panic and say something obnoxious.

    Imagine: For every stupid comment I post here on ST, I delete four before posting. That's right, the juvenile crap I post here is the cream of the crop. But in real life, I can't delete before posting. I don't get to see it in print before hitting "Post Reply." Once it's out of my mouth, it's out there. God bless my wife!

    Now that I think about it, what the hell is wrong with my wife? Why has she stayed with me all these years? (Note to self: Buy flowers.)
     
  17. abnormaltoy

    abnormaltoy Mouth breathin' knuckle dragger Strat-Talk Supporter

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    Ha! Save the money for the flowers...try this instead, just go up to her, hold her and whisper "thank you". She'll value that long after the flowers are in the landfill.
     
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  18. Nadnitram

    Nadnitram Senior Stratmaster

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    Intent: <holds her, whispers> Thank you!

    Reality: <holds her, whispers> Ummm... <panics, says loudly> A priest, a rabbi, and a stripper walk into a bar...


    I'll have the flowers on hand, too, just to be safe.;)
     
  19. abnormaltoy

    abnormaltoy Mouth breathin' knuckle dragger Strat-Talk Supporter

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    Ha! Surely you must have some swoover, you got her...right?
     
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  20. fezz parka

    fezz parka The Return of the Red Helmet Strat-Talk Supporter

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    Just be you. And to hell with what anyone thinks. :)
     
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