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Friend/ jam partner delima ? Input ?

Discussion in 'Sidewinders Bar & Grille' started by ocean, Oct 7, 2017.

  1. radd

    radd Strat-O-Master

    Jun 2, 2016
    Santa cruz
    Try honesty, that is what friends do
    ocean likes this.

  2. nigelr

    nigelr Strat-O-Master

    Aug 28, 2014
    I don't want to say bad things, but if you reversed the roles and were treating a friend this way and walking all over him you would be thinking the guy is an idiot and you wouldn't respect him. Well, this is what he thinks of you. He is using you, you've done your best and now it's time to move on.
    john lavelle, Scimmy and ocean like this.

  3. Vjerilood

    Vjerilood Senior Stratmaster

    Jul 30, 2017
    Yeah Ocean sorry
    Scimmy and ocean like this.

  4. Twelve8

    Twelve8 Strat-O-Master

    Dec 5, 2015
    Sheffield, UK
    In the long run cutting your friend off will likely help him.

    It may force him to deal with the root cause of his problems as opposed to patching up the leaks with your cash & good will.
    ocean likes this.

  5. bluejazzoid

    bluejazzoid Strats Amore Strat-Talk Supporter

    Aug 14, 2009
    Southeast USA
    You need to find another jam partner!
    Mansonienne and ocean like this.

  6. amstratnut

    amstratnut Peace thru Music. Strat-Talk Supporter

    Dec 1, 2009
    My house.
    Thats tough.

    All the above posts say to drop the guy. If he was indeed one of my best friends I might try to help him. However, Im not made if money and couldnt afford to pay his insurance etc. So, assuming he is a good friend going thru a rough patch Id continue jamming but say youre unable to continue helping financially.

    If he is just a jamming partner Id probably move on.
    ocean likes this.

  7. ocean

    ocean Most Honored Senior Member Strat-Talk Supporter

    Apr 14, 2015
    In a house
    No never happened .. avoiding confrontation I Guess.

  8. stratman323

    stratman323 Dr. Stratster Strat-Talk Supporter

    Apr 21, 2010
    London, UK
    I'm afraid that I've learned from hard experience (despite being warned when I was young) that once you start lending money to friends, they tend to keep asking to borrow more. And because it's difficult to ask friends to repay their debt to you, you tend not to get it back. And resentment sets in....

    "Never a borrower or a lender be" is what I was taught as a lad. It's true, sadly.

  9. Thrup'ny Bit

    Thrup'ny Bit Grand Master Curmudgeon Strat-Talk Supporter

    May 21, 2010
    Sheffield, UK
    ^This. It benefits nobody in the long run.
    fezz parka and ocean like this.

  10. Scimmy

    Scimmy Strat-Talker

    Jun 3, 2016
    Sunderland UK
    I once had an acquaintance who was like that. He'd borrow £10, and pay it back. Then again. Then it became £20 and he'd pay it back after a while. Then again. Then he came to me for £40, and I knew I would not get it back. I gladly gave him it, and mentally said goodbye to him, a pest.
    ocean and john lavelle like this.

  11. fezz parka

    fezz parka Ω Strat-Talk Supporter

    Apr 21, 2011
    Quit smoking. Problem solved.

  12. LPBlue

    LPBlue "That Guy", again...dammit! Strat-Talk Supporter

    Jul 19, 2012
    Canada, near the other end
    ...answering the phone etc. Can you assign his # with a special greeting "I'm not your parents...and I don't want to be..."?:cool: I went through this with a neighbor not too long ago.
    ocean likes this.

  13. Sarnodude

    Sarnodude Senior Stratmaster

    Sep 26, 2015
    Ocean... Do you live in the greater Seattle area? If so I am an employed non-smoker, and I don't mind jamming once in a while.

  14. ocean

    ocean Most Honored Senior Member Strat-Talk Supporter

    Apr 14, 2015
    In a house
    No unfortunately I don't.

  15. nuculer terrist

    nuculer terrist Senior Stratmaster

    Mar 12, 2014
    center of the mind
    Tell him you can help him financially by offering to buy his gear, then sell it when you fall on your own 'hard times'.
    He can't call you to mooch and jam if he doesn't have gear
    ocean likes this.