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Discussion in 'Bands on the Run' started by RichieS, Oct 31, 2017.
Can the band work without her?
Fire her. Give in to one ultimatum, get ready for more.
All of what you said is very true. Based on what I've observed so far, the angry/upset singer is the most talented singer in the band. She only gets to sing lead on 3 or 4 songs IN THE WHOLE SET! If you ask me, her talents are underutilized. She has a legitimate gripe, but the way she's going about resolving the issue is only going to cause more fighting
Never much cared for dramatics mixed with inflated egos. One of the benefits of remaining the ubiquitous "side guy"...I miss out on the purges that follow the dust up!
She is a very talented singer, but her talents were underutilized in this group. I think she sang lead on maybe 3 or 4 songs. Her ear for harmony will be missed...
EDIT: to answer your question, yes the group will work without her
I played drums for a band and replaced a drummer that was phenomenal and just way beyond what i was capable of. But the singer and writer wanted me over the other im gonna guess because of the type of person i was. Some will sacrifice one or the other maybe not for the rights reasons.
It's sad when it comes to this, but sometimes that's what you have to do. There are much better ways that this situation could've been handled than with an ultimatum.
When someone says do this or I’ll quit, there’s only one sensible response.
I noticed that too because the other guitarist in our band is dead set against women in the band. He’s had some bad experiences with prima donnas so he’s generalizing. Shame, we could do so much with a lady at the mic.
need pics of these 3 female singers to decide...lol
Gender has nothing exclusive regarding bunghole behavior.
My Dad used to tell me this:
"Boy, no one likes an arsewhole. But if you're gonna be an arsewhole, be the biggest one in the room."
The dice is cast. If you give in next week it’ll be something else. But as you say you’ve got work coming up which normally means you can get a replacement. Perhaps someone better. Couldn’t she have brought up these tunes in rehearsal without the ultimatum?
Our female vocalist ( old friend long time member ) started giving us terrible, ultimatums and missed gigs.
We would bring in other females singers from around the area to fill in for her... until we found someone that was better then our singer. She was real good and never complained and no drama. After a while we noticed the gigs went better with the replacement singer then with our old friend that seemed to cause cumas (chaos) the nights she did show up. So we fired our singer and gave the gig to her replacement. We also figured out that it was our singers new husband filling her head with stuff and poisoning her against us. But hey that’s water under the bridge. Our old singer posted on FB yesterday “looking for musicians to start a band” .... that would be her third or fourth band in the last few years. Her projects never last and we keep chugging right along
It took until post #30 for somebody to say this?? .
Yeah, gotta let that one go..
I'd say "Hey I guess all we can do is wish you the best on your future endeavors, but we do appreciate the suggestions on material to showcase the voices of "______" &"_______"".
May as well go out swingin!
Sorry if my OP sounded sexist. Totally not my intent and I apologize for the oversight
Male and Female lead singers are equally capable of being egomaniacs. I have experienced both kinds and they are equally annoying.
I'd expect you'll be fine with two female singers and bit more pocket change.
There can be drama (and will be ) in any band with any mix of peoples. I think it should be able to be worked out. I would just expect it would have to come down like " hey stop complaining " and that may be the end, then so be it.
It wasn't your post, it was more the direction that the thread took.
Divas, not matter which gender, are a pita to deal with .
Sexism that I've experienced in bands came from the females interestingly enough. In one band I was in, we had a female drummer and she was adamant that we not have a female singer...they cause too much drama. In my current band, we have a female singer and bass player. The singer told me that she was reluctant to bring her into the band because of potential drama. She admits herself that she is so glad the rest of the band convinced her otherwise because this gal is an awesome bass player and everything you could want in a band mate.
Both of those situations left me shaking my head...can't we just get along and play music!?!?!?
If I was band leader, depending on the history, Id ask why she gave an utimatum, instead of just asking.
My guess is she has tried before and been ignored.
As far as OP is concerned, due to his position in the band, he gets to watch it unfold.
Sounds to me she wants to be the "star" hence suggesting songs that really only "need" one singer. I'd say she's trying to push out the other ladies. Since she wrote how the other women look, I'd say she has some self worth issues.
I know/have known quite a few women that cannot be friends with other women (not many at least). There are quite a few that are just too jealous. It's like the girl that wants to be one of the guys, but doesn't want any other women around, because she might lose the attention (which of course she doesn't want or so says).
Play what pays, update the set(s) as needed. Evolving or changing is good but it has to be with everyone involved.