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Discussion in 'Sidewinders Bar & Grille' started by circles, Feb 10, 2019.
I'm snowed in today, which is fine. Have a quality Sunday!
It's an acquired taste...
OK, I'll try again...
Lassie comes back in the next frame, and barks once. Timmy says, " you mean I'm supposed to hit control-alt and del ...all at the same time?"
Gah... tell me about it. I have a degree in network administration. I'm the only one in tech in my family. My grandmother got new cable, an entirely new system switching from dish. When it wouldn't work, after I spent three hours hooking every room up, she wanted me to unhook it all and hook the dish back up since she hasn't deactivated it yet so she could watch tv. I don't even install cable!!!! I sit at a desk 95% of the time!
Full disclosure, I knew it didn't work right because someone had swapped the cable to the dish instead of to the pole. But, I couldn't get the cable off the splitter it was so rusted and despite the similarities the cables for dish and cable are not the same. I could have probably fixed it with a new splitter or going under her house but I am not allowed to come in contact with dirt because of my transplant.
ODE TO A PC
I’m just a little pc, I try so hard to please
But when it gets to the weekend, I’m fairly on my knees
I suffer from depression and sometimes wear and tear
But when my user contacts IT no one’s ever there.
I don’t like being networked or changing my e-mail
‘Cos every time we’ve tried it my programmes always fail
At night I’m properly shut down (that means that I can sleep)
But by the morning (strange stuff this) my files I cannot keep.
The midnight bug has struck again, IT say it’s a bug
But when my user asks “how come?” the result is just a shrug
I’d like to help my user out, aid him throughout his day
I’d like to find a way to keep these nasty bugs at bay
We’ve tried the Norton virus check till we’re sick of saying the name
But every morning, after I rest, the result is just the same
My short cut keys have disappeared my spread sheet’s lost the battle
Where oh where has everything gone, herded off like timid cattle
I’ve studied all the manuals, I’ve read up on self help
But two to three days every month I’m just left upon the shelf
You might think that’s a holiday a few days bunked off work
But when my user switches me on he feels he’s just a berk
His temper rages, his eyes go red, he even swears out loud
Where is the bluddy IT guy, what a useless lazy crowd
If I could solve my problems I’m sure I’d get a rise
A new mouse mat or just a clean would be a great surprise
I’m wonderful with EXCEL, dutiful with WORD,
When I switch between WINDOWS I hear the loud applause
So if I make all these efforts and my user does his best
Why, oh why is it IT Man always fails the test
He does his best (that’s what he says ) but leaves a lot to chance
I know that he has lost the plot when I see his sideways glance
Then it’s on the phone to HQ – “I’m lost I need advice
No I don’t think we need to scrap it, I’ll put the fault on ice”
So the problems back with IT, till God alone knows when
But when my user loses his rag they might get in touch again.
Our IT Man will tweak and tease and finally scratch his head
Will look in wonder at my screen then say “the programmes dead”.
My user, shocked and not amused will glare at him in horror
But he like me knows what comes next “We’ll get someone down tomorrow”!!!!!!!!