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What's the funniest insult you've ever received

Discussion in 'Squier Strat Forum' started by streatch, May 26, 2010.

  1. streatch

    streatch Strat-Talk Member

    36
    Jan 11, 2009
    Woodstock, ON Canada
    for playing a squier? I know the ignorance of the younger guys today is worse than when i was the same age (not that long ago), but this 19 year old "trying to play REAL metal" as opposed to the "fake, old crappy metal" sai probably the stupidest thing I've heard in awhile.


    This kid watches me unzip my gigbag and pull out my '95 MIM black logo "Squier Series", and walks over and says, nice guitar. Im thinking to myself, this kids gonna be fun to jam with and have a few beers.

    Then he proceeds to play as many open palm-muted strings as he possibly could in the span of 3 seconds while I stand there and think "uh, okay then."

    I usually like to warm up by playing some jimi or something fun, and suited to a single coil tone. Not thinking death metal.

    Long story short this kid gets pissed right off at me, and says "its a good thing you didnt buy a Real fender, cuz you have no idea how to play it." Now here's the kicker....he then proceeds to tell everyone in the room, that my guitar is fake, mexican and a piece of ****, BUT I'M MAKING IT SOUND LIKE A REAL FENDER.

    I've been playing for 15 years now, and I never realized that I had the REAL FENDER tone in my guitar, even though its fake.

    I pretty much handed this kid his teeth for the next 3 hours of jamming and he ended up getting himself kicked out of the party for being a douche.
     

  2. Lua1

    Lua1 PolyMayerMaple Strat-Talk Supporter

    Mar 24, 2010
    Avondale
    i dont think thats an example of how disrespectful and dumb young people are.....i think you just encountered someone with a serious psychological condition. like....my ex was a total dick, and would have probably thought you were an idiot and assumed your guitar sucked, but even with that and even with just being a bad and disrespectful person, sane people just dont act that way in my experience.

    of course....i havent been around too many musicians :D
     
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  3. streatch

    streatch Strat-Talk Member

    36
    Jan 11, 2009
    Woodstock, ON Canada
    I can respect your thoughts on this subject, I was just blown away by this guys lack of respect just because I owned a Squier and not a real Fender. He in no way affected my opinion of the younger generation, other than his prowess at guitar hero and lack of real musical talent.
    Another thing, is it just me or is Guitar Hero insanely hard compared to playing the guitar for real? I can play a lot of the tunes on my guitar, but when it comes to hitting multi-coloured buttons, I feel like a newb all over again, lol.

    I find myself wanting to smash that plastic strat into oblivion anytime i try to play it with my 6 year old nephew.
     

  4. Lua1

    Lua1 PolyMayerMaple Strat-Talk Supporter

    Mar 24, 2010
    Avondale
    lol....i wouldnt know....im a beatles rock band player myself :D

    but yeah....i would get too frustrated about the guy or feel disrespected....it sounds more sad than anything....i think he was probably just a crazy person. :D
     

  5. streatch

    streatch Strat-Talk Member

    36
    Jan 11, 2009
    Woodstock, ON Canada
    You seem like a pretty level headed person, and I agree, he must have been crazy.
    Ive spent a lot of time around different levels of guitarists, and there's always been a mutual respect between those with the flashy gear, and those with the pawn shop beaters. It's supposed to be all about the music anyways, not how much dough you dropped on the latest bells and whistles.

    I signed a deal to record as a session guitarist when I was 17, and spent many days at the studio with guys that had more money sitting in their case than most people have in their garage, and most of them loved the way my Squier sounded and played.

    I always try not to judge a guitarist by the axe he plays, but more on the raw talent and amazing sounds that they can create with their hands.
     
    chris64 likes this.

  6. yauckt

    yauckt Strat-Talk Member

    11
    Apr 1, 2010
    Belgium
    Well, since i purchased a pink bullet strat, lots of my friends are not confident anymore with my sexuality :D They talk about a strato-gay-ster or something... :)
     
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  7. jflintmac

    jflintmac Most Honored Senior Member Strat-Talk Supporter

    Age:
    54
    May 2, 2010
    Canada
    "Stick around, this guy will show you how to play"

    I was at a makeshift - summer party last year when this guy showed up (also named Jeff) and that is what the girl that owned the house said to me.
    And he heard her , And I heard her , And every body heard her.
    OoooKay! I thought.
    Instant tension was felt by all - including new Jeff
    A few beers later they put a guitar in his hands (acoustic) and he tunes up.
    Meanwhile I am cooking the steaks.
    They call me in to play off I guess but I am thinking to myself - maybe I'll just stay out here and cook. I thought, either this guy is going to suck (leaving me giving lessons during a party) Or this guy is going to be a big show-off displaying his acoustic Van Halen.
    Either way, I wanted no part of this.
    So he starts to entertain with his best Neil Young and Eagles camp fire oldies and the party continues.
    Alcohol ensues and so he begins to start repeating songs which is always a good way to end a party so I decide to help as a tune or two has come to mind that he might know but has forgotten. So I grab the other acoustic and down I sit.
    We start out with a two part Hotel California and it goes over pretty well for what it is.
    So I dig out an old -"do you remember this one" song which reminds him of something that he had forgotten and then me, and then him again.
    It was really cool.
    We just kept going and going, and the songs got better and better and better still.
    And each time he would show off a little bit - I would dig up something to counter it with to hopefully put him in his place.
    We must have jammed for five or six hours, back and forth whilst every one else applauded our dual.
    It was the most FUN I ever had at an impromptoo jam session. I don't know who won but it almost never happened because of that girl's comments at the beginning of the night.
    I've never seen Jeff again.
     
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  8. srv4fr

    srv4fr Strat-Talker

    344
    Apr 9, 2010
    Canada
    Yeah. I've gotten "You gotta hear so and so play He's amazing!" And that always peaks my interest as a guitarist. I had this happen recently. A good friend of mine took me out to see his "awesome" relatives new band.. I was pretty geared up. And ultimately let down. It was very low average local pub cover material quality. And I was all set up to hear the next coming of SRV. I just left me feeling bad for the guy. Which I didn't want to do. Not really an insult per say. But very much in the vibe of what you posted jflintmac.

    I'll have to think up an insult.. I can't seem to remember any at the moment.. I guess they are all repressed. :)
     

  9. jflintmac

    jflintmac Most Honored Senior Member Strat-Talk Supporter

    Age:
    54
    May 2, 2010
    Canada
    They are in there...

    Try banging your head off of a metal post.
    Something's bound to surface!
     

  10. zombiebear

    zombiebear Senior Stratmaster

    Age:
    27
    Jan 25, 2010
    Fort Wayne, IN
    Well i've had quite a few...

    My band was playing a show downtown. We played pop/punk, you know we sounded like; blink 182, green day, ect. We ended up playing a metal show, we got screwed like no other. We had to pre-sell 90 tickets, which we did. We were scheduled to go on 3rd, well the douche in control decides that the opening band wasn't gonna be ready, so he throws us on 15 minutes early. (take in consideration that all the people we sold tickets to were not there) We were playing for a metal crowd and trying our hardest, the sound guy had my bass turned down, the guitar up, and we couldn't hear each other. Final song comes around, he turns off one of my vocalists mics, so we got off time BIG time. Well we are all over the place and everyone in the crowd feels bad for us, and start cheering for us...

    The tech manager for this big metal band (sky eats airplane) comes over and said; "Well you tried and failed, learn to play music before you play, now get the f*ck off the stage so you don't hold anyone else up."

    If i would have still been holding my bass, i probably would have smashed it across his face.

    We got a bit of payback on the guy running the show.
    All of our fans demanded a refund of their money, and if they didn't get it, they were gonna sabotage the show.

    Others like, oh you're playing a squier, can't afford a gibson or something? Then you blow them out of the water..
     
    brians likes this.

  11. motoman45

    motoman45 Strat-O-Master

    Age:
    58
    876
    May 20, 2009
    portland, or
    omgggggggggggg. lua said dick....lmao
     

  12. Lua1

    Lua1 PolyMayerMaple Strat-Talk Supporter

    Mar 24, 2010
    Avondale
    sky eats airplane is terrible. i never liked them and now i hate them.:mad:

    this thread is teaching me one thing....its going to be socially acceptable for me to behave like a giant **** to people once i have a band and am mildly good. im not even going to try to come up with insults though....im just going to get up in peoples faces and go dduuuuuuuhhhhh.....duuurrrrrrrrrr.....wahaha" and then scowl at them hatefully.
     

  13. Lua1

    Lua1 PolyMayerMaple Strat-Talk Supporter

    Mar 24, 2010
    Avondale
    lol....i just said the b-word too but it got stared out:oops: this thread is showing me my true nature. :D
     

  14. whitestrat

    whitestrat Strat-O-Master

    623
    Apr 9, 2010
    new orleans
    i showed up with my strat to a gig and the sound guy said "Are you sure you don't want to use this one? Its a 2000 PRS you'll get a better tone out of it"

    hahahahaha
     

  15. whitestrat

    whitestrat Strat-O-Master

    623
    Apr 9, 2010
    new orleans
    2000 as in 2000 dollars
     

  16. Lua1

    Lua1 PolyMayerMaple Strat-Talk Supporter

    Mar 24, 2010
    Avondale
    paul reed smiths are pretty but the sound like castrated les paul when i play them. i think i will really like them when im good though :)
     

  17. StratDen

    StratDen Senior Stratmaster

    May 23, 2008
    NY
    Regarding my pink Squier Bullet, I was asked "Is that your daughter's guitar?". To which I laughed and replied, no she has her own, this one's mine! :)
     

  18. Lua1

    Lua1 PolyMayerMaple Strat-Talk Supporter

    Mar 24, 2010
    Avondale
    lol i would love a pink squire.

    fwiw, as someone who does love the color for girlish reasons too in other areas (ive painted rooms pink :D), when i see a pink strat it doesnt even look feminine to me....it just looks like a vintage surf guitar type color....i actually picture like a manly black guy backing up the temptations or something like that as my first association.
     
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  19. zombiebear

    zombiebear Senior Stratmaster

    Age:
    27
    Jan 25, 2010
    Fort Wayne, IN
    You're weird.

    But for some reason, i have to completely agree with you. I just don't see a kid wanting that, but i can see a father of a couple of girls buying that cause he likes the color 0_o
     
    Nate D likes this.

  20. amstratnut

    amstratnut Peace thru Music. Strat-Talk Supporter

    Dec 1, 2009
    My house.
    With my mittens for hands I'm surprised I've never been insulted musically. I have on occasion put my foot in my mouth as far as saying so and so sucks. I've learned to be more tactful, but for some reason its taken me a while. I've noticed my mom and sister both are pretty blunt sometimes without meaning offence, so I wonder if it has something to do with my family culture when I was growing up.